One of Those Days

This last Sunday, Ezra struggled. It was as if he was on fire in his own skin. There was little we could do that offered him comfort or calmed him. I have no idea what caused him to have such a hard day. It could have been a number of things…change in the weather, maybe he didn't sleep well the night before, maybe there was a noise that set him off, it’s possible that the tag in his shirt could have been bothering him, the list could go on and on. Many times we are left with no explanation for why he has had a good day or a bad day. Last Sunday was just “one of those days”.

After a full day of spitting, crying, throwing, hitting walls, and writhing on the floor, Ezra ended his day by getting a hold of my dinner glass and throwing it onto the ground where it broken into pieces. I honestly don’t even know if he realized what he had done. I’m not sure that he even noticed me when I corrected his behavior. He seemed as though he was in another world; completely detached from the reality of things around him.

His daddy very tenderly picked him up from his highchair and carried him to his room. He helped Ezra into his pajamas and laid him in bed. Jake laid with Ezra, prayed over him and told him how much he loved him as Ezra continued in his detached-from-reality struggle. And then, Jake zipped Ezra’s bed close and shut the bedroom door behind him. (Ezra sleeps in a special bed designed for children with Autism) Ezra was asleep within minutes. He was a tired little man.

As Jake came back out to the kitchen, I was quietly cleaning up the little shards of glass that covered the kitchen floor as I listened to Grace (my daughter) chatter on about a story from school. The glass went into the trashcan, we put Grace to bed, and we set down on our couch to finally catch a deep breath after a very long day. This is just a part of our everyday life. Not every day is this hard. This past Sunday was just “one of those days”.

Have you ever had “one of those days”?  I’m sure you have. Maybe your “one of those days” doesn't look quite like mine, but we all have days that are hard. For me, it’s what I do about “one of those days” that makes all the difference.

Let me explain. I have learned that you can have “one of those days” that causes you to not want to get out of bed to face another day. Sometimes the struggle of a situation can cause you to want to shut the world away. A common tendency is to instantly begin building walls of protection around ourselves when we have “one of those days”. Throw in a disgruntled attitude with a dash of sadness and maybe even a pinch of self-pity and you get a recipe of allowing yourself to sink deeper and deeper into the gloom of “one of those days.” It is easy for me to do this. Maybe it’s easy for you to?

Here’s the deal. Life is hard. It just is. When we depend on our own strength and resources to survive “one of those days”, we walk away with a little piece of sadness and exhaustion each time. If we continue to depend on our own strength for “one of those days” it is possible to find ourselves in a self-made pit of despair. I can’t go there. I don’t want to go there.

So, what if having “one of those days” meant that it was an opportunity to depend on the Lord more? He is able, friends. What if having “one of those days” meant that I would be in constant communication with the Lord, presenting my requests to Him (Philippians 4:6) and asking for His wisdom (James 1:5)? What if having “one of those days” meant that I ask Him for His peace that surpasses all understanding (Philippians 4:7)? What if all the trails and hardships of having “one of those days” brought me closer to the feet of Jesus? There is peace there. There is rest there.

When my sweet baby boy is writhing on the floor as if in pain, it is the Lord that I cry out to. When Ezra is in a disconnected struggle that I cannot help him to break free from, it is the Lord that offers me peace. When things just seem to be falling apart, when the check book just doesn't add up, when there is sickness, when there is sadness, when I am having “one of those days”, I no longer lean on my own strength. I do not have what it takes. That friends, is because the Lord designed each one of us with a need in our lives that only He can fill.

I hope you are having a great day today. But if you seem to be having “one of those days”, may it become “one of those days” that you run to Jesus. May it be an opportunity to grow in your faith, depend on Him more, and may He shower you with his peace and His grace. He loves you. He longs for us, His children, to run to Him when we are having “one of those days.”

“I love the Lord, for he heard my voice; he heard my cry for mercy. Because he turned his ear to me, I will call on him as long as I live.”   Psalm 116:1-2

Silos and Fabulous Shoes: The Loneliness of a Cookie Cutter Culture

 I have thought a lot over the last few weeks about an epidemic that I believe is taking our culture by storm-Loneliness. We have our “Pinterest Perfect Pictures” and our “Flawless Facebook Fairy tales” that are flashed before our eyes as the golden standard for living. And even though I believe most of us realize that these are not all attainable or “must haves” for our lives, they somehow still have the power over us to make us feel less. We text instead of talking-it’s more convenient and more direct; you can cut out the “fluff” and get to the point. We live in a world of fast pace and instant gratification.

Please do not shut me out. This is not one of those “let’s all go live on a mountain and eat nuts and berries” kind of blog posts. I love Pinterest and I’m on Facebook. I text probably just as must as the next gal and my schedule is jam packed with events. But I have been wondering how much all of these things contribute to the fact that in one way or the other, many of us feel lonely.

It is so very easy for the people living in today’s culture to lose their authenticity. It’s much easier to put our mask on every day as we walk out the door and to act as though we've got it all together. And even though very few, if any of us, actually fit into these cookie cutter lifestyles, we want so very much to act as though we do.

I would compare it to a lady buying a fabulous pair of shoes… The shoes are gorgeous. They are the shoes that everyone wants. Surely everyone will be envious of this pair of shoes. The only problem is that they are two sizes too small. So, this lady hobbles around in her gorgeous-too-small- for-me shoes, as she smiles and welcomes everyone’s admiration. But here’s the deal: she is in pain. She is rubbing blisters. And every night before she goes to bed she must soak her sore feet in warm water and put Band-Aids on them before she slips her tired, worn out feet under the covers to rest. And the next day, she does it all again.

I wonder how many of us do this with our hearts? I wonder how many of us are walking around with Band-Aids on our hearts because we feel we have to, or we must act as though we've got it all together.

You see, a mom crying over her special needs child and his struggles is not a very “Pinterest Pretty” thing. What about the single parent? The divorced parent? The couple having marital problems? The couple that has just lost their baby? The man struggling with depression? …the list could go on and on and none of these are “Facebook Fairy tales” but each of them are very real and happen every day.  It seems that we live in our own lonely silos believing that no one on the outside would or could understand what we are facing.

Many of us have a true failure to connect. We stuff our lives and true feelings way down deep inside because that’s what society has taught us to do. We have more connection to a social media site or a television show than we do to actual people. And then, we wonder why we feel lonely.

If only we could spark a generation of authenticity. This is something the Lord has laid heavily upon my heart. I do not have to have it all together nor must I fit into a cultural cookie cutter.

Having a son with Autism has definitely helped to open my eyes to the freedom that can be found when you toss out whatever your “perceived normal” is and embrace the life the Lord has gifted you with-the good and the hard times. I try not to worry about what everyone else’s six year old is doing or what great milestones they have achieved. For my child, every step taken independently is a victory, every word spoken is music to my ears, and every time he is able to bring himself to look me in the eyes, my heart melts.

I don’t mind telling you that it is very hard. I don’t mind telling you that there are nights that my husband and I sit on our couch and cry because we have watched our child struggle all evening. I don’t mind telling you that most days my house looks like a tornado has run through it because, well, that’s just the least of my concerns right now. I don’t mind telling you that the ONLY way I make it through each day is by finding my strength in the Lord- because I don’t have it in me to do all this alone. And do you know what? Something about being able to come to grips with this and toss out the cookie cutter lifestyle is quite liberating.

Let’s just get honest. When we take off our masks and get real with one another, that’s when we can build authentic relationships. No, I am not trying to encourage that we walk around airing our dirty laundry with whomever we meet or having a “woe is me” attitude. What I do want, is for us to no longer feel it necessary to live in our own little silos of life, feeling lonely, and only coming out when we feel we might be able to produce the very best “canned version” of ourselves, based on what the world says is acceptable. I fear that far too many of us are putting Band-Aids over all our wounds in order to achieve a false fairy tale front that will only result in loneliness.  

By the way, I’m also not necessarily trying to encourage a “fast from Facebook” or a “pilgrimage away from Pinterest”, but it is good to have a reminder that no one is perfect.  We are all imperfect. We all are in desperate need grace. None of us have it all together.  Isn't that refreshing to remember? 

So, go out to lunch with your friend. Have a real conversation. Talk about real things. Remind them that they are not alone. Instead of judgment, let’s offer love covered in grace. Let’s do life with one another! Let us safeguard one another from the epidemic of loneliness. Let’s be authentic!

"But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus, his Son, purifies us from all sin."         1 John 1:7

Thirsty

 

Jesus has a history of using those who most would consider “unusable” or “less likely to succeed”. I love that about my Jesus. He creates everyone with purpose and all of us have the opportunity to be used by Him to do great and wonderful things- even a child who has Autism.

I would spend a very long time if I were to list all the many ways that the Lord has used Ezra (my little boy who has Autism) in my life and in the life of our family. The Lord uses Ezra to constantly teach me things about love, life, and priorities. Because of Ezra, and the Lord allowing him to have Autism, my faith has grown stronger and I have learned in a very real way what it means to lean on the Lord completely as my source of strength. The Lord is always teaching me things through the life of my special needs child.

Last Saturday was no exception. Our family was scrambling to get out the door. Jake was going to help and friend with some yard work, Grace was going to a birthday party, Ezra was going to his “Lolly’s” house to play, and I was the chauffeur for the day. As we all hurried to get ready for our busy Saturday morning, I noticed that Ezra was struggling with something. I had made him juice that morning inside the blue Sippy cup with faded pictures on the side of it. (Something you should know about my little man is that he is VERY particular about the kind of cup he drinks out of. He can be so extremely thirsty, but if the drink is inside of a cup that is different, has a different kind of lid than what he is used to, or has a design that he is unfamiliar with, he will have a strong aversion for it to the point of not being able to drink, despite his extreme thirst. Yes, this is just all part of Autism) I gave Ezra this reject, faded Sippy because, well, that’s the only one that was clean (Maybe he won’t notice, right?).

So, on the coffee table this cup of juice sat, as I watched my little boy pace back and forth, trying to decide if he could bring himself to drink from this faded cup. I watched as he ran to the kitchen and brought out a couple of water bottles. He tried to open them and gave up quickly. He ran back to the cup of juice and stared at it for a while. He could not bring himself to drink.  He was becoming frustrated.  Next, he saw his sister’s cup. He immediately ran over and took a big gulp of her drink, but it was milk and he doesn’t really like milk, so he threw the cup down and began to cry. Then, it was back to the water bottles, but after a short time, he had given up again. Now he was in tears even though he knew exactly where he could get the drink he so desired. He just could not do it.

I went to the kitchen and began to wash a more “Ezra approved” cup so that my upset and thirsty little boy could have a drink. As I was washing this cup, I had a little check in my spirit. I do this too! So many times I am thirsty. I am thirsty for love, thirsty for acceptance, thirsty for peace, and thirsty for fulfillment. I busily rush around trying to “drink” from different people, places, and things that might fill me up and satisfy the desires of my heart.  All the while, Jesus is there offering me that love, acceptance, peace, and fulfillment that I so desire to have.  Just like Ezra’s juice cup, I know the Lord is there and I know what He has to offer. Why in the world is it then that I seem to run to Him as a last resort; when I am parched and exhausted from trying to “drink” from the world and what it has to offer?

I handed Ezra the “approved” juice cup. He drank and drank and drank. He was a thirsty little guy! Maybe someday we will help Ezra to be able to drink from various cups. For now, that’s just not on our radar. We have more important things to worry about like talking, playing appropriately, self-feeding, walking appropriately, etc.

As for me, I am so thankful that the Lord uses my sweet boy to teach me and to remind me of my need for time spent with my Heavenly Father. He fills my cup! I need to spend a lot less time running from one source to the other, looking for fulfillment. The Lord is my all in all. He is my source of strength. He fills me up!

Thank you Lord, for the great many ways that you use my sweet boy to draw me nearer to You. Thank you that You alone offer lasting and unconditional love, acceptance, peace, and fulfillment. May I drink deeply!

 “Whoever believes in me, as Scripture has said, rivers of living water will flow from within them.”    - John 7:38

 

The Reminder

I want very much for my blog to offer encouragement to others. I also want to offer true understanding and insight into the life of a family with a Special Needs child.  With that being said, today I am allowing myself to be just a bit more vulnerable. Today I am allowing myself to confess to you that some days are just very hard. Not hard as in I-may-shed-one-glistening-tear hard, but more like I’m- going-to-do-the-ugly-cry-into-my-pillow-all-night-long-and-wake-up-with-racoon-eyes-for-work-the-next-morning hard.

Today’s topic came to light after one of my Love In a Different Language-reading-friends recently made this comment to me “I love reading your blog! You offer so much encouragement! You really seem to have a handle on life with Autism!”   Whoa.

First, I am so glad to know that someone besides my mom reads my blog! Secondly, I am so glad that my blog-reading-friend found encouragement in reading it. There are so many sweet ways that the Lord offers me encouragement on this journey of Autism and I love to be able to share that with others. However, I will admit to you that I certainly do not have a “handle on life with Autism.”

What I do have a handle on is this truth: I will NOT make it through this Autism journey without the help of my Jesus. Plain and simple.  And that, my friends, is because it can be hard. Very hard.

This past week was a very real reminder that life with Autism can be very unpredictable and challenging. Ezra had a rough week. A family member was sick and with all the back and forth visits to the hospital and interrupted schedule, Ezra struggled. What does it look like for a child with Autism to “struggle”? Well, for Ezra it means any combination of the following: screaming, crying, aggression, constant movement (as if he is on fire in his own skin), wants comfort but can’t stand to touch, touches but can’t control impulse to hit, spitting, throwing….it really just depends on the day.

Other moms who are further down this journey of having a child with Autism have told me that the first five years are without a doubt the hardest. I imagine that is probably right. You see, with a little one, you are starting from scratch. You have to find out what their “triggers” are. You have to discover what works to help pull them out of these “Autism meltdowns”.  And no two kiddos are the same! I have heard it said that “Once you’ve met one person with Autism, you’ve met one person with Autism.”  How very true. What works for my Ezra may or may not work for the next child with Autism. Therefore, life as my family knows it often times turns into a constant game of trial and error. I know this trial and error way of life will not last forever as we are little by little figuring out what “works” for our sweet boy.

I will tell you that there are many feelings of helplessness.  This past week, that is how I felt. Because I watched my baby struggle as I tried one thing after the other to try to comfort him, and nothing helped. We just had to wait patiently for about a full week for him to wake up “clear” and happy again.

I will tell you that there are many feelings of being alone. This is certainly not a ploy to achieve the highest level of Facebook friends or to beg for an invitation to your home for dinner. I’m just being honest. It is lonely. Yes, we are unable to go and do as others are able to go and do. And yes, some of our friends and even some family members feel “uncomfortable” around Ezra and keep their distance. But that’s not really even the kind of “lonely” that I’m talking about.  

This feeling of loneliness can come in even a large room full of sweet friends and loving family. It’s the kind of lonely that comes from feeling that there are very few who would or could understand your family and why you do the things you do, act the way you act, discipline the way you discipline, and how this thing called Autism effects every aspect of who you are. It’s the kind of lonely that comes from worrying: will he have a meltdown? Will he get upset? What is my plan if X happens? What is my plan if Z happens? And even if he IS having a good day- what if something sets him off?   This was a lonely week.

Please do not for one minute think that it is all heartache all of the time. On the contrary, I feel so very blessed to have been chosen to walk this journey with my sweet baby. There are so many wonderful and precious moments that I will forever treasure. The days when we “struggle” make the good days that much sweeter. I truly believe that parenting is a calling and I also believe that God equips the called! I do not take for granted the fact that God chose me to be Ezra’s mommy. I trust that He will equip me to be the best mom for Ezra that I can possibly be.

Yes, it is hard. No, I do not have a “handle” on life with Autism.  There is a lot I do not know and there are a great number of struggles that I could share with you. But don’t we all struggle from time to time? You may not be facing the same struggles I am, but I would venture to guess that you have a set of struggles all your own.

I will tell you that there is no way I could make it through this Autism journey without my dependence on the Lord. He is my source of strength. He is my source of joy. He continues to reveal Himself to me in sweet ways throughout the good days and bad.

Even this past week, in the midst of a very rough time, the Lord gave me such a special verse. “My ears had heard of you but now my eyes have seen you” Job 42:5. This verse spoke straight to my heart. This is my prayer for myself. I don’t want to just “hear” about the Lord and how awesome He is from other people. I want to experience and “see” it for myself on a day to day basis. I hunger for that. I need that. THAT is how I make it through this thing called Autism.

It is my prayer that through it all, good times and bad, that the Lord would continue to reveal Himself to me. I pray that I will “see” His grace, His love, and His mercy carry me through even the toughest of days.

It’s true. There is a lot of laughter, many tears, and much love in our home. It’s not always easy. But I am so thankful that “The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit” Psalm 34:18. I needed to be reminded of that this week. Maybe you did to?

This was our "happy" for the week. 

This was our "happy" for the week. 

Temporary Home

I don’t listen to a lot of country music. Don’t get me wrong, I like country music just fine but I am usually jamming to the tune of Veggie Tales in the car with the kids most days. One day recently, I had the rare opportunity to be in the car alone long enough to justify turning on the radio and I decided to skim the channels. I’m not even sure which station I landed on but a nice melody had started playing and I listened along.

It was a song by Carrie Underwood called “Temporary Home” and the chorus brought tears to my eyes.

This is my temporary home, it's not where I belong
Windows and rooms that I'm passing through
This is just a stop on the way to where I'm going
I'm not afraid because I know
This is my temporary home

I instantly began to think about Ezra, about Autism, about our frail earthly bodies. I have no idea what Ezra’s future holds. I don’t know if he will ever be able to fully communicate. I don’t know if he will be able to connect with others.  I thought about how he is in a constant fight with himself and his impulses. I don’t know if he will ever be free of these things here on earth.  There is a lot I don’t know and it can be very overwhelming.

While I am in constant prayer for ways to help our sweet boy here on earth, I do hold tight to the promise of eternity. I am so thankful that the Lord has entrusted my sweet boy to me until that day. I pray for many many more years of snuggles and loves from my Ezra. I pray that we will be able to help Ezra overcome many of the Autism "obstacles" he faces. But I do know that one glorious day, my Ezra will sing words of praise to the Lord, he will run on streets of gold, and there will be no frustrations or fears. What a precious sight that will be!

Oh friends, if you are weary from whatever circumstances you are facing today, I pray that you would be encouraged. This is not it. Our lives are but a vapor that is here for a little while, and then vanishes away (James 4:14). As Christians, we have the promise of eternity!

I am so thankful for the promises of God… they are eternal promises! While I am so thankful for the blessings the Lord has given us here on earth (our life is extremely blessed), I am so glad that this is just our temporary home!

Revelation 21:4 “And God shall wipe away all tears from their eyes; and there shall be no more death, neither sorrow, nor crying, neither shall there be any more pain; for the former things are passed away.”

Perfect Peace

“You will keep in perfect peace him whose mind is steadfast because he trusts in you.” – Isaiah 26:3

I have a confession. I have a very hard time memorizing scripture. No matter how much I want to have God’s word “hidden in my heart”, it just doesn’t come easy to me. It’s something I really have to work on.  So, I have adopted a little habit that helps me to memorize these little life-giving nuggets of truth. This habit is what my husband jokingly calls my “Unabomber Notes.”

I have scripture written on little post-it notes which are hidden all around our house (I guess you could call that Unabomber-ish). So, as I go through my day I can read these verses and as they encourage me, I am also memorizing them.

This verse- Isaiah 26:3 – has become one of my very favorite verses. In fact, I love it so much that if you were to visit my house, you would see it not only written above my kitchen sink, but also by my nightstand, in my car, and in my day planner.   

The reason this verse has had such a huge impact on my heart is because of a thought I had not too long ago. This was my thought:

On one of the rare occasions that my sweet boy (with Autism) is able to look up at me and actually make eye contact with me, what will he see? Will he see a mom that is Tired? Frazzled? Or Frustrated?  OR will he see a mom that is Peace-Filled? Content? And Joy-Filled?  What message am I sending both of our children? What do they see when they watch me?

You see, in Isaiah 26:3 the Lord says that he will “KEEP” us in Perfect Peace if our mind is steadfast because we trust in Him. I am so very convicted to be sure that I am constantly putting my trust in the Lord and meditating on His word- because that is the only way to “keep” in perfect peace.

If you have a child with Autism, then you know that most of the time, your house can rarely be described as peaceful. However, I am coming to understand that even though my life in general may not always be described as Peaceful- I can still be Peace-filled. That’s what I want. That’s the example I want to set for both of my children.

Thank you Jesus that you offer us Perfect Peace!

Uncertainties

There are many uncertainties when it comes to Autism. What is the cause? Is it something I did? Will there ever be a cure? Will my child receive the help he/she needs in order to be successful? Will my child be made fun of at school? Does my child know how much I love him/her? What would my child tell me if he/she could talk? What’s going on inside that little mind? What does his/her future hold? The list could go on and on and on.

With all these uncertainties it is so very easy for me as a parent to become completely overwhelmed by the What Ifs, What Wills, and Why Nots (the “three evil Ws”).  I let these uncertainties rise up in me until my heart feels as though it’s drowning.

There was one particularly hard day that I had had enough. I felt defeated by Autism and the “three evil Ws”. It wasn’t that Ezra was having an incredibly hard day, he was actually having a rather good day. But I have come to realize that just as my special needs child has those “bad days”, so do I. There are times where I just sit back and watch him and the uncertainties flood my mind; setting myself up for heartache and worry.  This day was no exception and I felt helpless.

So, I decided that instead of dwelling on all the uncertainties that Autism entails, I would make a list of certainties; the things I know without a doubt are true despite the grip that this syndrome has on my little boy.

What I am certain of:

-God has a purpose for my child and He will accomplish that purpose in spite of any syndrome or disorder my child may have.

- The Lord chose me to be the parent of my child. So, despite the fact that I may feel inadequate at times, I AM the perfect person for the job…the Lord chose me especially for my child!

-This is not our home. As a Christian, I know that one day we will trade in these earthly bodies for perfect ones. What a glorious day to see my sweet child and listen to him sing WORDS of praise to the Lord.

- The Lord will provide. The Lord will provide exactly what my child needs to accomplish his God-given purpose. We may or may not be able to afford the best of the best treatment or be able to go to every kind of therapy/program offered but the Lord will provide what we need in order to accomplish His special purpose for my child.

-God loves my child with a love far greater than I could ever comprehend. How much more must his heart break for my child and his frustrations and how much more must he rejoice with each triumph.

-The Lord never promised me “easy”. He did, however, promise that He will never give me more than I can handle. I must learn to lean on Him for strength.

- God is in control. He is on His throne. Nothing comes as a surprise to Him. He’s got this!

Such peace fills my heart when I remind myself of such certainties! I am so thankful for the peace of knowing that the Lord, my Heavenly Father, is in control!

Philippians 4:6 “Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”

I See

Ezra doesn’t have many words. At least, not near as many words as other children his age. It’s just part of the whole package being “on the spectrum”. Communication has always been hard. 

Ever since Ezra was a little baby, when I sensed his frustration in being understood, I would hold him up right in front of my face and say “I see you, Ezra”.  It didn’t have an instant calming effect on him or anything spectacular but it was my way of letting him know that I knew he was there, I knew he was frustrated, and he had my attention. This has become something I do quite often. It also serves as a great reminder to myself…  See him. He is not just throwing a fit or being unruly. He is frustrated. He wants to be seen. He wants to be understood. Look past the hitting, screaming, spitting, and fighting…and SEE HIM. 

Eye contact has always been hard as well. However, even if it’s just for a split second, when I focus my eyes on my sweet boy’s eyes and tell him “I see you, Ezra”, he almost always will at least throw a small glance in my direction. 

The moments when Ezra lets me in to his world and we are able to share a laugh at something, when I am able to understand what he wants, or simply being able to make eye contact, these moments are priceless. I forever treasure them. On the days when Ezra struggles more I find myself watching with a sort of desperate curiosity… what is he thinking? What is he trying to cope with? I wonder why he does one thing and not another? How can I help? I think these questions are good. Never stop asking questions. Never stop trying to “see”.  

There is a part of Ezra that is locked away and trying so very hard to find its way out. Never stop asking the “I See” questions. I want to be sure that my sweet baby knows that “I See” past the behavior, “I See” a precious little boy, “I See” a boy that God has a specific plan and purpose for, “I See” his struggling, and “I WILL See” that he has all of the love, support, encouragement, and help that we can possibly give him.

Go figure that one of the few two word “sentences” that Ezra goes around saying is a repetitive “I see, I see, I see.”  I see you too sweet boy. I may not always understand, but I see you and want to learn more and more about you each day.  

Just a thought:  Don’t we all want to been seen and understood? No matter who you are, I believe we all have these desires. Aren’t you glad that the Lord sees us? He knows the desires of our hearts, our struggles, our triumphs… and despite knowing everything about us he loves us unconditionally. Thank you Lord, that you notice us and you love us! All of us. No matter what.